It has always intrigued me how easily some people make friends. I know that some people forge a friendship in grade school and remain close with that/those people well into their adult lives. Some people meet in a casual capacity later in life and strike a bond and become close friends for the remainder of their years. Other people make dozens of friends throughout their lifetime. Some close, some casual, some fleeting. Friends come and go.... and for me, they mostly go! I don't know how I've had such bad luck with friends. I'm easy to get along with. I'm kind and compassionate. I think I'm funny. Since I was very young, I have lost touch with so many of my friends, mainly because they have moved away. Some of the closest and 'bestest' friends I had as a youngster moved to other cities with their families. That was way back in the day before email or MSN or instant messaging. As young children, our only means of communicating over the miles was through snail mail. [Long distance phone calls were expensive and reserved for family only]. And as young kids often are, we weren't very reliable in keeping each other up to date and before you know it, we had lost touch and moved on.. At least 3 of my Grade school 'best friends' moved away.
Once in high school I had many buddies that I would spend my free time with, chat with on the phone, go shopping with and do girly things with. Two of those friends were particularly close, but one I considered to be a best friend. But once again we lost touch. It's a long story but it is still today one of the biggest regrets I've ever had.
Some psychologists might be able to give me insight as to why I've never been able to secure a lasting, close bond with a friend. I know I couldn't have helped it if someone moved away, but with relocation, strained relationships, and having some weird friends along the way, I have since become very hesitant to open up my heart to just any body. Don't get me wrong, I've got many acquaintances and many social friends that fulfill both DH's and my lives but I will always regret losing that one, best, do-anything-for friend.
If you have one of those friends, tell him/her how much they mean to you. You never know what tomorrow will bring.
*ETA - just found out today that two of our closest friends are calling it quits. I am so saddened by this news.
7 comments:
I love your real and honest journaling! I hear you on how much easier it is to stay in touch today than it used to be. I had a wonderful friend in college that I lost touch with...if we had e-mail then I bet we'd still keep in touch!
Big Hugs!
Yes, I too really like reading your entries. I feel like getting a cup of coffee and staying a while.
Looks like you have some good friends right now. Being from a military family, I always felt gipped in that area when I was younger.
Sometimes, those people that leave are meant to. I think the most important fried is your husband anyway :) and you have that!
Debb--
I can totally relate to this, on all levels! I have many casual friends, but now I do not have that one close-do anything for friend. I miss that. I have always tried to keep in touch, but sometimes life gets in the way and has other plans for us. Please know that you are special, and without ever having met you in person, or "knowing" you.......... I connected with you right away. I can tell you are very different from me, but something draws me to you and I think it was your artsy creative side. The rest of you is simply a plus in my book!!! So I'm telling you that you are special to me. (I know it's probably not the *friend* you are seeking, but I'm here for ya in whatever capacity you need.
-Kaz
Kaz, what a nice thing to say!! I truly consider you a friend!
I would have to agree with Sue and Kaz. I have to tell you I enjoy your journaling as much as your pictures. Your personality shines through in both.
hmmmmmmmmmm Debb, I didn't see my picture up with your list of friends. I found your post pretty interesting and could totally relate about the long time childhood/school friends. Personally I was very hard on the exterior and very hard to get to know, I always felt so vulnerable due to my childhood experiences and living conditions. So I have basically kept in touch with 2 of my highschool friends through emails, unfortunately we don't get together often as they have their own busy lives and now live in another city.
In saying all that, since I started to scrapbook, I have met, honestly, the best friends I have ever had in my whole life. We are a group of 6 very close knit women and I love each and every one of them equally, they love me in return, accept me for who I am (which is a little crazy) lol, and are non judgemental, always open for critisism and are never afraid to communicate (thats a biggy), I trust them with my heart and would easily do anything for them in a heartbeat.
Debb my friend, I consider you a dear friend, we have so much in common it stinks lol, unfortunately the distance holds us back :( But if we lived in the same city we would definitely be best of friends and close, I have no doubt in my mind about that!
Know that you have a friend here that cares about you, even if I'm far away :(
xxoo
Karen
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